Fourth of July Time Party People, which means it’s the time of the year when WaWa dictates that we should eat hoagies and drink sugary drinks…Festivities kicked off on June 27 as “Wawa Hoagie Day: Stars, Stripes and Hoagies Forever,” feat…ured Hoagie spokesman Mayor Nutter, and a record breaking 4.5 ton hoagie…(yes…even the Fourth of July is for sale these days and the whole 4th week has borderlined on shameless promotion for hoagies, Oscar Meyer “Selects,” Kraft Food’s attempt to appeal to the high end processed meats market, Stoneybrook yogurt giveaways, Kia sunglasses and Dollar Food hand fans. Someone’s got to sponsor this party, and Party Blog does approve of corporate sponsorship when it involves free shwag, especially free sunglasses courtesy of the NBA-Kia Performance tent, or free pictures in front of a cut out of Blake Griffon.
DJ Ro Parrish also spun a hell of a set in the blazing heat on Saturday afternoon in the NBA Nation DJ Booth (and we especially enjoyed the focus on Fresh Prince raps – go Sixers)…Party Blog does appreciate Wawa, the NBA, and other corporate sponsorship which helps bring free concerts July 3 and 4 (next year we want a Blue Cross Blue Sheild Dunk Tank) but the silly promos that go with it…well…we can’t help but laugh.
The Bottom Dollar Food fans actually came in handy. Later that evening, two friends of the PartyBlog (Damon and Keisha) visited all the way from our West Coast Sister City – San Francisco – for the 4th festivities, a wedding, and Keisha’s 30th birthday. PartyBlog (after a fine meal at one of the finest but not cheap restaurants in town, Zahav) proceeded to Cavanaugh’s River Deck (so that our guests could truly experience what a night out on the town is like in Philadelphia. Comments included – wow, that was much more like the Jersey Shore then I expected, and, hmm, I can’t believe I slipped on someone’s vomit and hurt my knee). After the “Philadelphia’s Sexiest Man Contest,” in which local meat-heads and one skinny crack-head-look-a-like tramped on stage shirtless, for a bar tab determined by the loudest crowd noise, followed by the fan favorite, “Wet T-Shirt Contest” – events when described to @CRSNPhila the following morning prompted the comment – “Well, I didn’t realize that it was Spring Break during the summer this weekend” – the Cavanaugh’s mist-fans ceased to function properly on one of the hottest nights thus far of the season. Logically, I removed these free Bottom Dollar party favors I had been carrying in my red Kia Performance grocery bag received earlier, distributed one Damon, as we began to utilize the fans to cool off the various party-goers. Our greatest “fan” was a young man in his mid-twenties, sporting a crew cut and button down blue business shirt, who, enjoying the breeze provided by our arms, happily danced before us in the midst of an impromptu dance circle, before demanding to hold the fans himself.
The young sage proceeded to place his drink in his mouth, grabbed both fans, spread his arms like wings, and flourished to create a breaze for those those around him with both arms flying like an Eagle, all the while balancing his Cuba Libre between his teeth, by biting on the plastic ring surrounding the cup. He moved dexterously among his revelers, for as brief as his dance was in Earthly seconds, his image nonetheless carved into time. Once exhaused, Damon and I continued our duty to fan others throughout the evening. Damon, with his cropped hair and ivy league demeanor, all the while displayed a shit-eating grin, an expression reflective of the desperate and euphoric nature of the party, a delightfully debonair combination of politeness and mockery. His arm-waving paradoxically honored and parodied those receiving his winds. One young man, with a sweat soaked grey shirt, was so inebriated did not even notice the light gusts whirling before him, as we waved him away. Certainly, however, the best dancers received the fanning as deferential bows to their prowess, and they accepted the honor, such as our young Eagle, who prompted our fanning by signalling that we come hither, only to stumble on the slippery planks before quickly being pulled upright by his fellows, in a swinging motion that allowed his drink to spill, yet dignity to be maintained. At a certain point, when Call Me Maybe came through the PA system, the fans were flourishing at top speed. Once an LMFAO montage followed, I even tweeted @LMFAO, hoping to entice party gods Redfoo and SkyBlu to Cavanaugh’s for an afterparty with my promise of 5 dollar Jameson shots (their concert had just finished at the local ampitheatre). Alas, while the Party Masters did not respond (inevitably participating in some sort of crazy hotel party the likes of which shall remain unknown) Cavanaugh’s nonetheless did not disappoint, and certainly, the usefullness of the Bottom Dollar Fans, cause the PartyBlog to declare the following Party Rule:
- When Partying in the Dead of Summer at an outdoor riverdeck or beach deck, make sure to bring your hand-fans to keep the napes of your fellow revelers cool. A bit of charity goes a long way at the party. An unexpected windfall includes the ability to shoo-away bothersome gnats who lack proper decorum in the party-atmosphere…
In keeping with the theme of free parties and the party-favors that go with it, the PartyBlog is going to do you a party-favor and give you the remaining schedule for the free parties worth attending for the Fourth of July Week as brought to you by WaWa:
- July 3–POPS on Independence (Independence Hall, 8 PM). Philly POPS (and Peter Nero, obvi) play some freedom inspired orchestral jams, so bring some camping chairs sit back and chill…
- July 4–4th of July Jam and Fireworks, hosted by the Roots. Questlove seems to be everywhere these days, which is fine by us. Seems like the Roots are finally getting their due in the City That Gives Nobody Any Credit (aka Haterdelphia). Show runs from 7PM to 11PM, and is sure to mess up anyone’s day who’s going to work on the 5th of July…(We question whether having the 4th on a Wed. is the worst or best of possibilities, because it seems like people are just taking the whole week off instead of one day?) Check the other free Wawa Party Events at www.facebook.com/wawawelcomeamerica